When we think about how to balance out our personal and professional lives, there is a mental process that kicks off trying to find ways to change the way we work & live for the better.
Studies showed that achieving better balance between professional and personal priorities requires to a combination of reflexivity. This means questioning assumptions to increase self-awareness and intentional role redefinition.
What is it?
Work/Life Balance is a continous mental process.
Finding the right balance between our personal and professional lives is :
Not a static equilibrium point at all times of our life, but rather, a moving equilibrium point that moves according to the life events we are going through.
Not a one-time fix, but rather, a cycle that we need to be conscious about as things/events evolve throughout our life.
Work-Life Balance is an on-going process, and not a static target that you try to reach. In other terms, all of us including yourself and myself are in continuous search for the right balance between our personal and professional lives.
Work-Life Balance cycle
Work-life balance cycle is composed of 5 episodes:
Step 1. Take a step back and ask yourself:
What is currently causing me stress, unbalance, or dissatisfaction?
How are these circumstances affecting how I perform and engage with my job?
How are they impacting my personal life?
What am I prioritizing?
What am I sacrificing?
What is getting lost?
It’s usually a life-changing event (such as the birth of a child, or the death of a loved one) that makes us wake up and realize/recognize that we need to @
take a step back,
become aware of the mismatch between our current professional situation and our personal priorities,
begin to denormalize our habit of working long hours.
Step 2. Pay attention to your emotions
When you gain full awareness of your current situation, examine how that situation makes you feel.
Ask yourself those 2 questions and the answer them candidly:
Do I feel energized, fulfilled, satisfied? or
Do I feel angry, resentful, sad?
We need to have some understanding of our emotional reflexivity.
Emotional reflexivity is the capacity to recognize how a situation is making you feel.
Being fully aware of your emotional state is necessary in order to determine the changes you want to make in your work and in your life.
That is why, you should answer the previous 2 questions candidly so that you change what really needs to be changed, and not something else.
Step 3. Reprioritize
Increasing your cognitive and emotional awareness gives you the tools you need to put things into perspective and determine how your priorities need to be adjusted.
Ask yourself:
What am I willing to sacrifice, and for how long?
If I have been prioritizing work over family, for example, why do I feel that it is important to prioritize my life in this way?
Is it really necessary?
Is it really inevitable?
What regrets do I already have, and what will I regret if I continue along my current path?
Step 4. Consider your options
Before jumping into solutions, first reflect on the aspects of your work and life that could be different in order to better align with your priorities.
Ask yourself:
Are there components of your job that you would like to see changed?
How much time would you like to spend with your family, or on hobbies?
Step 5. Implement the change
There is no right/wrong answer to whether you should do a public or private change, as both of them can be really successful if you implement the change in a sustainable manner.
For private changes, this could mean setting limits for yourself (such as refusing to work in the evenings, on weekends, or during holidays and sticking to your decision) or declining demands typically associated with your role (such as new projects or travel requests, even if you are under pressure to accept them).
For public changes, this could mean securing support from key mentors, partners, and co-workers, or even officially applying for a new internal position or a flexible working scheme.
Quick summary
Finding the right work/life balance is not a one-time activity.
It is a continuous cycle of self-re-evaluation and adjustment that all of us go through indefinitely (consciously and/or unconsciously) to make changes that are meaningful to our lives.
Whether in your personal or professional life, you should continuously remember to :
1. pause,
2. connect with your emotions,
3. rethink your priorities,
4. evaluate your alternatives, and
5. Implement changes that make sense for you!
If you struggle finding the right work/life balance that suits you, I would be happy to offer you a free consultation call. During our consultation, we can discuss your specific work/life challenges, explore options and agree on working together on supporting you in finding that balance you are looking for.
You can contact me via WhatsApp on +44 7 484 274 986 or directly through my website by clicking here.
Sincerely yours,
Mariam Bennouna
Master LifeCoach Certified by the International Coaching Institute
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"Mariam has coached me for about six weeks. From the first session, she has been highly professional and helped me better understand my priorities and what I would like to achieve personally and professionally. In addition, she helped me to build a disciplinary action list to keep me motivated and help me achieve my goals. Thanks to Mariam's coaching, I am happy about what I have achieved and the awareness I developed during this short time."
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